i cant anymore
just too dead
im sorry
come out tears, flow down
stop being so stubborn.

sadhana 1

so i side tracked today
not good.
but thanks pebs =)
i really needed that.
love you too. <3

Its a world filled with lust,greed and desire

and im battling my way out

times when girls these days make it so hard

and i lose control

so its down to this

the ability to control my mind

with the given methods to me

i shall acquire the skill

and hit that 21 day mark

ready.set.go

school

gym

hockey

tabla and vocals

its been a routine these few days

my body's tired, so's my mind.
falling sick. the body's falling apart
im trying not to let things affect me
trying to focus on the main thing.
but im losing it.
and i so just want to keep silent. in my own world.
its times like these i wish
for that something special. anything
to put that smile across my face, and keep me going.
but i cant complain. i cant stop to think.
gota keep moving u see, cos times running out.

these constant dreams about you

every single night ever since,

they're affecting me badly.

they're stirring up desires within me.

but every night b4 i sleep

and every morning when i wake up

my prayers are said

to keep me focused

at this point i dont want anything

other than what he wills for me.

dream

as i fell asleep, a dream came to tempt me

but when my eyes opened, and i realised it was just a dream

it killed me. so very badly.

dissapointments

:'(

i just want you to know that i love you.

but no time to emo.
i've got shit loads to do.
the constant emo line will be constantly covered up.
Cos the next one month's gona be a storm
"The main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing"
Stay focused thiru.

Freshmans

Ngee Ann Hockey Club

Freshmans Camp

21st - 24th June

I say awesome!
Plus minus the minute details
What can beat spending 4 days and 3 nights with my kya bath gang
And the 3 powerpuffs. Haha those guys have potential and i really look forward to working with them.
The indoor and the outdoor games.
The bhangras. wack i tell you
Sat night made me realise so much.
I'm proud to be where i am now. In this school. in this team
The brotherhood.
The guys are all pumped up.
ready to go with our eyes fixed on the goal.
And like hanif and I promised
" A year to remember"...

ZooHoo!

Crikey! What a day.

Tiring. But yet so refreshing to the dead body.mind.soul.

And i can only thank god. For it was just so perfect.

And not for a moment did the mind wander.

awesome :D

i love you guyz :)

The groupshots;

that sexy elephant next to sharania
sai,jj,rek
she simply adores meshiva.uma

The guyz

Kumz.sharania

The 3

The me's.

And yes, we found some WEIRD things in the zoo.

Butterfly man
I swear i din noe which was the nose
Smth that reminded me of Ah Ng

the "EH.EH.EH" Tribesman

Crikey! An animal out of its enclosure. The WA Express

The Rama Family
Pimp my Ride Zoo edition
A hit and run incident
Hall of shame

A dead tourist

And so the day ended;

With a debrief

And some soul searchin'
Some found true loveWhile others realised that they are just meant to pose.

Oh and here's a tribute to REKHA for the free tix. Thanks alot :D

Meri Yaad Rakhna

"Dil Keh Raha Hain Dil Se Vada Karo Dil Se

Chaahe Tum Jahaan Bhi Jaana Jaanam

Meri Yaad Rakhna, O Meri Yaad Rakhna"...

By Adnan Sami

Simply words-cant-describe

My heart is saying to ours to make a promise
No matter where you may go
Remember me always
Hmm the seasons might change but dear please remain the same
Walk with me on the path of love
My beloved remember me always
Return quickly when you have gone away from me
Don’t keep my heart waiting by making excuses
In a full moon night in my sleep in my dreams
Beloved remember me

- translation

and just when i was drowning in the beauty of the song

as every note pulled strings in my heart

and i lost myself in the magic of love;

i saw her picture

TEH. sorry no emo-ing allowed

:)

just when i was about to be crushed

the boulder on my shoulder was lifted
and the weight of these feelings
gone :) emo who?

water

Water

A performance at the Victoria Theatre
By the Temple of Fine arts feat. The chinese orchestra
Me. Sai . Shiva . Kumaran
Classically enriching :)

present

there comes a point in my life
when the contorted mixture of feelings;
untold sorrow.betrayal.anger.fear.insecurities.
become a fixed constant. a straight line
and i learn to silence the feeling,
but dont be fooled. for its there. only invisible to the naked eye.
but wait.
i'm actually smiling :)
cos i'm slowly mastering the art
of harnessing the energy that drives this feeling
and use it for the better
fool this ain't emo;
cos i bet u wouldnt last more than a few steps
in my shoes.
you run and hide from the past.
but i was raised in such as to never forget the one i loved.
and my heart still feels the same way.
one day the truth will blow up.
and then you'll realise. only maybe when im gone.

but when the past is pain
and the future is dark
dont put your leg, each on one end
and pee on the present.
Live in the present, and make every sec count.
Do your shit and fear not.
For your promised rainbow will come soon :)
(and that my dear is the logic of the Just Past, Far Present & Near Future)

Pirates

Dinner and Late night movie with my family.

Been ages since i went out with them.

My sisters are Crazy i tell you.

moulmein

bhajans at moulmein
then a sleepover at sai's hse
i love his moms cooking man. simple and satisfying
and then the movie mozhi
one of the best movies ever made i personally feel.
oh and here's a pic of a SICK bell thingy made by some uncle in the bhajan.
crazay

Chill Out in Paris

Chill Out in Paris

Nitin Sawhney- Beyond Skin

Fusion

June 10

shiva's hse prayers
jamming
bhajan practice that got pushed later -.-
SCC vs NYP
1 - 0
horrid. my worst match.
and i got carded.
for going to my team mates aid.
"Not your match Thiru"
yeap i noe.
so wad's wrong with me eh?

let it go thiru, let it go.

Happy birthday MA :)

NGEE ANN Street Soccer
5-A side Tournament
SILVER
Miss3Turners
When it comes to down to penalties.
AWESOME.
Cos thats one thing i noe i rawk at :D
save!
(and all these wouldnt have been possible if you were still in my life)

morning convo

conversation with my dad in the morning;
the law of nature
angels around us
the cycle of samsara
nirvana
so basically fundamentally summarising:
do the right, the law of dharma

i forecasted it long ago
and now that its confirmed
its time i start preparing myself
but when reality hits me i noe,
that its gona hurt oh so bad.

come back vayuputra pls

naalai ulagam

i shouldnt have listened to those songs

but i couldnt resist, the beauty of tamil love songs

its been so long since i have lost myself in thoughts and memories

i still love her.

i dont noe if its wrong or right to.

but my heart still has a place reserved

but i know indefinetly, that its not meant to be;

but then why?

such is the plight of one sided love :)

naalai ulagam illai yendral, azhage yenna seivai?

bad ass coffee

I had a pinch of EGO added

to my cup of coffee this morning

something told me yest night that its gona be neccesary

not used to it but i think its for the best

storm in a teacup i tell you

CMA

BANG BANG BANG
and i'm left with CMA
woot.
Logan's leaving for NS tomoro.
Fear.
Erm not for him. But for those at tekong.
This guy's gona reak hell there man.
Better inform the ghosts over there too.
LOADS of plans for after exams
especially for the band.
had lunch with them today.
and i must say time flew.
and the most freq used word : "PODU"
lol

You enter and close the door behind you
Now show me the world as seen from the stars.
If only the lights would dim a little,
I'm wary of eyes upon my scars.
So what am i to you? Now? and in the Future?
i give all only cos i noe. in the coming future u'll be gone
and these memories im sure wont mean anything to you
just like how they never did the time b4
maybe cos i give too much.
but then again its just me.
but then again.

live. and let die

oh so pist
oh you're so fake
bla bla bla bla bla all the shit you talk about me
hate me.
what she said was right. being nice aint gona work
cos people just take advantage.
live. and let die.

just rem, the one common factor...

zzzzz

its been me and books
oh ya and the sunday div3 hockey match
SCC vs Jansenites
4 -3
an awesome come back.
FMGT,BLAW,HRM,CMA
-.- zzzzz
im so glad atleast i have NG's booklet

coming back

its been long since i posted.
i think theres so much going around i lost control
nth big this week. just the usual trainings and studying for common tests.
urgh

but emotionally, there seems to be a baggage.
im in a state i hate to be in. one where i feel vulnerable
but its a phase and i noe it'll pass.
and i've made changes in my life to deal with it.
and now i shall attempt to release this negativity in me by writing it out

anger.
stop being so fake cos i can see thru you
all the sweet talk means no shit to me
cos u're not sincere and i noe that :)
i only moved away cos u were doing something wrong
and i foresaw everything.
pls dont try to put the shit on me now.
cos it wont take me long to lash back :)
stop pushing me, dont antagonise me
ur sarcastic comments dont make u smart
slowly but surely
i'll see you eye to eye :)
i'm honoured by the amount of attention you girls are giving me
although i dont really need ur bad mouthing
pls find some other topic to talk abt :)
stop thinking abt yourself cos thats not what the worlds only about
everyone has feelings and needs too
but u dont seem to understand.
wake up bro. :)
we were given the opportunity and potential
to be different from the rest
lets not screw it up guys :)