Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Friday, December 26, 2008
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Thursday, November 27, 2008
All around me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for their daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
Their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I want to drown my sorrow
No tomorrow, no tomorrow
Children waiting for the day they feel good
Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday
And I feel the way that every child should
Sit and listen, sit and listen
Went to school and I was very nervous
No one knew me, no one knew me
Hello teacher tell me what's my lesson
Look right through me, look right through me
And I find it kinda funny
I find it kinda sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It's a very, very
Mad world Mad world
Friday, November 14, 2008
tabula rasa
So close, no matter how far
Couldn't be much more from the heart
Forever trusting who we are
and nothing else matters
Never opened myself this way
Life is ours, we live it our way
All these words I don't just say
and nothing else matters
Trust I seek and I find in you
Every day for us something new
Open mind for a different view
and nothing else matters
never cared for what they do
never cared for what they know
but I know
nothing else matters
TABULA RASA
1.a mind not yet affected by experiences, impressions, etc.
2. anything existing undisturbed in its original pure state.
3 .an opportunity to start over without prejudice
I'm asking myself now
how long more can i keep this up?
feeling hurting trying denying
god i really want to just let go of everything
not get affected by anything that happens around me
abolish nostalgic moments that hurt
the drive is blurred
by sex love and hate
eliminate melancholy
god show me the way
stop me from thinking and make me do
for the past to be forgotten
and a new tale to be told.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Friday, November 7, 2008
between two points of sorrow
and although at first i desired happiness
i've come to realise that too much of anything
is poison.
being happy tanslates into less practicality for me
the more angry i feel, the more i want to achieve
the more agony i feel, the more i stay disciplined
maybe the problem is the definition of happiness
i search for mine.
this is for you,
you who's getting closer
you who's becoming an addiction
i need to stay focused,
not because i like you any less
but because the past has cultivated
this paranoia
i was brought up in fear
raised in rejection
and so i have this drive to prove wrong
and i cannot let anything get in my way
yaarum theendaatha thendral ni,
in the end
i want you to be happy.
Sunday, October 19, 2008
changed the way i am now
this is the period where god exists
or atleast i become more aware of him
i become stronger and more focused
and as i stood infront of her chariot
i made those vows, in hope that she would guide
like the tree that provides shade to others
without caring about itself
i've begun to stop telling my problems and worries
keeping it locked inside
throwing them into the fire that burns in my heart
only to let let it burn brighter and higher
the flames keep me warm
i've seen my kindness been betrayed
and i've learnt to give to he who deserves
i've set my sights on the goal
i'm not looking back
and i'm not gona tell you either.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
in the name of god.
Watching these clips left me in a state of total confusion. Anger, rage with a need to prove wrong but at the same time to forgive and to understand. Yet more importantly to just ignore such people and not get affected. A very bad concoction I should say.
It’s ok to believe in what you believe, but just don’t look down on what others believe. One person’s mistake should not reflect upon the whole. If your god said love all and at the same time that he’s the only one and the rest are fakes and non believers will go to hell. Hmm really something not right there don’t you think. How ironical.
However I think the problems stems from a bad upbringing and a lack of knowledge. The Indian guy was blabbering utter rubbish that was not factual and his bloody English gosh he ought to be shot. Such a disgrace. As for the American I’ve got nothing much to say about people who conform to almost anything and indulge in inbreeding.
Remind me, that this is what I want to do, what I want to prove.
Friday, October 10, 2008
I’m still thinking about you, I still feel you with me
Everywhere I go I see you,
Everything I do you’re right there.
I think it just makes it hard when I think of how fast you moved on.
Its left me with a scar that seems so impossible to heal
And now I find it so hard to believe
When they say they do.
Why am I running after the things I want
Only to run away from things that want me.
Oru poiyavadhu sol kannae
Yen kadhal neethan yendru andha sollil uyir vazhvaen
I’ve learnt life lessons my friend.
I’m gona end both your chapters and never look back.
I shall never dare to write another chapter in my books
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Navarathiri
What's next?
Anbin theivam and mudhal kanave :D
Thursday, October 2, 2008
keep it on the low, cos my heart can't take it anymore.
bleah that's ignorance and i ain't no fool.
its been such a train wreck;
the past years i've seen heard experienced
and the past few weeks have just been crazy.
and the past 2 days the craziest.
and after everything she dedicated unfaithful to me..
honestly how can even the sweetest girls turn out to be such sluts?
I'm aiming for what Jay Z sang, what kumaran's been driving hard at me.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
You people are running off at the mouth
cause my mind's made up anyway
I'm taking the high road going above you
this is the last time that I'm gonna trust you
You can say what you have to say'
cause my mind's made up anyway
all that bullshit you talk might work a lot
but it's not gonna work today
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
I watch these girls that love their boyfriends
No matter how bastard the guys are
And how badly he treats her
She still loves him for who he is
And the years spent together
Makes it impossible to leave him
I watch these girls that fall in love with boys
Telling me how they miss their him
How he makes her go crazy
And how she just cant get enough
And even when it all seems impossible
How she doesn’t want to let go off him
I watch these best friends
Over a decade of friendship and more
Memories that they talk about over and over again
And no matter how much a jerk one can be
The other one understands
I watch all these from afar
Enjoying the beauty of love etched in every single moment
But I can’t help wondering where I went wrong
Actually. I can’t help wondering what’s your plans for me.
and i realised how everybody's having some kind of problem
looking for answers so much that they shun the world wanting to be alone
and in the process end up hurting the ones around
we're all hypocrit bastards
laughing at others for their "emo-ness"
but in the end we're guilty of the same shit
i'm not afraid of my weaknesses,
so take of that mask you're wearing and stand tall.
take it from me, no one's gona solve your issue
except you.
so rather than wallowing in self pity
why not search within
trust me you'll find the answer there.
i've lost another one.
things have happened over the few months
but i'm not phased
smiply cos i saw this coming
looking back at time, its more like a cycle in my life
no one has stayed too long, no one could ever come to close.
i've learnt to live my life alone, independent
it's not the best way to live
but fear and phobia will push you into it.
and this time my lips are sealed
i just don't see the point of telling people my problems and worries anymore
but i've rectified one thing,
i'm never gona go out of my way to help someone i like
its just not worth it.
and take it from me, if you're waiting to be understood.
its never gona happen
thank you for the good times,
you were a good friend.
Monday, September 29, 2008
So what, you dont think that we can see your face?
Resurrecting back before the final fallen
Ill never rest until I can make my own way
Im not afraid of fading
Im not tired forever
Everything that I believe is fading
Its my time to dream
Dream of the sky
Make me believe that this place isnt made by the poison in me
Help me decide if my fire will burn out before you can breathe
Breathe into me
I stand alone
Friday, September 26, 2008
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
home
Lines take me higher
My mind drips desire
Confined and overtired
Living this charade
Is getting me nowhere
I can`t shake this charade
The city`s cold blood calls me home
Home it`s what I long for
Back home where I belong
The city - it calls to me
Decadent scenes from my memory
Sorrow - eternity
My demons are coming to drown me
Help - I`m falling, I`m crawling
I can`t keep away from its clutch
Can`t have it, this habit
It`s calling me back to my home
I remember the first time she came to me
Poured her soul out all night and cried
I remember I was told there`s a new love that`s born
For each one that has died
I never thought that I
Could carry on with this life
But I can`t resist myself
No matter how hard I try
Living their other life
Is getting them nowhere
I`ll make her my wife
Her sweet temptations calls me home
Home it`s what I long for
My home where she belongs
Her ecstasy - means so much to me
Even deceiving my own blood
Victoria watches and thoughtfully smiles
She`s taking me to my home
Help - he`s my brother, but I love her
I can`t keep away from her touch
Deception, dishonorIt`s calling me back to my home
Her story - it holds the key
Unlocking dreams from my memory
Solving this mystery
Is everything that is a part of me
Help - regression, obsession
I can`t keep away from her touch
Leave no doubt, to find outIt`s calling me back to my home
There’s always a point in your life where you’ll hit rock bottom
Currently I just dug beneath rock bottom and buried myself
I’ve never experienced such a low.
To make things worse, it’s not an event but rather a period
All these fingers pointing at me
Claiming that I’ve changed, every so ready to judge me
Bitch you were never there by my side
So don’t fucking run your mouth aite?
All this pressure’s choking me
The weight on my shoulders making me buckle.
Or so you expect.
Disciplined Rudiments
Abs and Guns
North indian + Rock vocals
Sundar Kaantham
Akshara Concepts
Pengal Silanthigal
Language
Spongebob the observer
I’m not who I used to be.
If you think your life’s fucked up think again
I’m not taking anymore excuses, not giving any either
Life ain’t roses and rainbows my friends
Its uglier than you think.
And if any of you assholes think you can make it worse for me
Watch your back cos I’ll be coming for you.
Less said more done
Thiru’s changed. Deal with it.
Success is my only motherfucking option failure’s not.
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Oh Mother.. I made friends of a falcon
Flying here, flying there, we exhausted our wings
I have fallen in love with the dreams of the fiery one
Says Firdaus if there were a paradise on earth this is it..this is it"
Awesome music video
More importantly the strong message behind the song
superb.
Friday, September 19, 2008
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
AEROCRATZ dhool 2008
So what made me go and watch Dhool 2008 live? Its this group. AEROCRATZ.
Yes i maybe a bit biased cos i have friends dancing from the group. Yet i know that if you watch the clips below you too will have your views changed.
What i like. Their commitment and passion. Their drive to be different and unique. Their readiness to sacrifice and their pool of fans, family and members supporting them.
Common indians just like you and me they're not perfect, they too hone the typical habits of indians. Yet i say they stand as role models to the indian society.
For their quarterfinals they did the instrumental version of THUMBE VA by ilaiyaraja. A piece in the raagam kaapi. Their theme was inspired by the ugly duckling. They were able to present the song with such feelings and the message came strong and clear. A really good attempt at contemporary dance.
As for the semifinals they did the popular 80's song tholvi. Nobody would have guessed that you could dance to such a slow piece but yet again they proved us all wrong. I infact had my doubts but in the end i was moved to tears by their performance. They were in the song and they were able to bring the audience into the song too. Truly commendable.
As a whole the dhool show's pretty good. Kalaiselvan's effort at bringing the youth indian society is commendable BUT there are these few uncouth indians that are too shallow to realise this.
An indians strongest and weakest point is his mouth. For that fact i commend VADI, not only for his excellent hosting but also for being to tell these people in their face that they should shut their gap.
From the bottom of my heart i wish AEROCRATZ all the best for your finals. rock on =)
a revolution awaits...
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Saturday, September 6, 2008
"The Last Goodbye"
Friday, September 5, 2008
no really weird
she had to prove her words, dont bet with a saggie
i've never had someone been this sweet to me.
you know who you are and you're truly appreciated
life has taught me alot,
never to judge a lesson in time i've been educated about.
and you have been full of surprises ever since day 1.
i say when you give without expecting
you will recieve tenfolds
a blessed future with joy and laughter to you =)
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
sudha ragunathan
tomorrow's vinayakar chaturthi
Saturday, August 30, 2008
what grabbed me was the fact that they were willing to do anything for music
and they had the backing of family and friends
a rare thing in the indian community
they spent 2k just on the show itself and the shocking truth
it was just a 2 hr segment of a tamil camp in newtown sec
just to show the kids what music really is about
kudos to prathap and dinesh
i sang what i would call "neruppu songs"
hey aatha, aasai nooru vagai,kodampakkam area.
lol really not me but i actually had a gd time
and i learnt a lesson in entertainment.
oh and the last picture was when i danced with one of the auntys on the dance floor
cos i was approached by the students to dance but i din want to.
that reminds me. the warmth of the aunties hai hai.
truly music and love.
Friday, August 29, 2008
Monday, August 25, 2008
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
I sincerely thank god for helping me through my FIT paper and the friends who cared and wished.theres actually a HELL alot of things that have happened in the past few months that i have not updated about. i will after my exams k.
im losing my fitness touch and i dont like that. on the other hand i freaking despise running. how like that? that plus my freaking low metabolism rate. and exam stress makes you eat like no tomorrow i swear.
over time i have met so many musicians. many have inspired me and many have disgusted with equal magnitude. i honestly cant imagine a life without music and i dont mean this in your typical "oh musics life, i miss music, music is soul" bull crap. over time i've learnt how music basically sums up in two words. Discipline and passion. If god gave you the gift of being musically inclined and you're not doing anything about it, honestly shame on you.
Im running around chasing my music dreams. There was this time in my life when i was so crazy about it i used to blabber "drums,guitar,djembe.sing sing" when i was sleeping.
But god loves to test i guess. I want to state here for all my friends. Music and friendship are 2 different things. Yes they might overlap but they are individual entities. Friendship can make your music lazy and from experience i say this. My whole band became lazy and its depressed me so much. It actually shattered my world. Yet i know my ethics. I still hold on to these friends in hope one day things will work out.
I have to stop worrying about others and concentrate on myself for now.
DJEMBE AND HINDUSTANI VOCALS. for once in my life i took the chance of being superficial. why in the world do we things that will hurt us unknowingly? i still dont get it. How can someone be so emotionally shallow. You're just another lesson learnt girl.
the world arounds quite shattered and everythings a mess.
i'm trying to pick up the pieces and put them back together.
Before you can love someone else
You need to learn to love yourself
and for that you need to accept yourself for who you are.
At the moment im learning and learning.
i admire the phoenix, trialed by fire only to be reborn.
Friday, August 15, 2008
cardinal avenue
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
and when i took this picture i could only ask
that he too would watch over me.
and now i pray...